panoptic

Over the last few years, a ‘trend’ has emerged amongst animal activists. It seems that to be considered a ‘real’ activist, the words one uses — even the names one drops — are more important than anything else. Visible are the emergences of aspects of a boys club, a clique, even a cliché in circles of people/activists. Irrespective of whether one acts (and it seems many talking the talk do not), it is how one can express themselves in these terms that is seemingly more important. Activist cred is based on the words used, not the actions and involvement in seeking outcomes for animals.

These words were uttered to me recently. I think they can be quite apt a description. They were made in regards to writing a PhD thesis (something I had been trying to complete for the last 12 months). Many people I have spoken to share similar sentiments. Advisers are patently aware of this and push you to improve your work only to the point just before it breaks you. I literally reached that point a number of times in the last year…

Over the weekend – well it stretched out a bit longer – I went on my longest bike ride/cycle tour – and my first fully loaded. A friend was leaving family, hometown and all associated to ride across the country – I joined her for the first two days of the ride (330km) and then rode back (via a different route, 315km). It gave me some to think and dwell on a number of things – more of a personal nature than my usual random ramblings in the context of current events… I am certain these will permeate through the next few posts here as there are a lot of things I want to share, as well as topics I already wanted to write on.

Two things stood out – my sense of time, and also my approach to food. Some days I spent upwards of 9 hours on my bike yet ate maybe less than half of what I normally consume. I was not hungry at all (I did consume a lot more water) and had so much energy. My metabolism is still high and I have a lot of energy…

What struck me, and I thought I would share my thoughts on, is the impact that my friend getting on the boat had on me. Writing about it today I realized we had only met a month ago… After we had a rushed good-bye (which I had not pondered before it happened at all) and I waited for her to come out on the deck so I could take a pic, I could feel tears welling in my eyes… That we may never see each other again…